whims: June 2006

Friday, June 30, 2006

Place

I must leave Lincoln. I must go somewhere where I feel excited and stimulated. I must find a place where I'm happy.

Or, must I make the place I'm at that place I'm searching for?

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Waiting

waiting. I'm waiting. SO annoying. I know I should be doing more with this float time, but I just want to know where I'll be going! I sound like a broken record.... I'm waiting to hear if I'll be swept away in the next fews weeks to work on an exciting campaign or if I'll need to find another part time whatever job for the rest of the summer. I also want to know about Peru. The woman who's organizing my trip visited with the clinic this weekend. And??? It's been half a week now since her visit. No tenia tiempo para contactarme????? Well a few more days. In the mean time, I've just gotta make sure I get up before 1pm everyday; it's harder than you might think.

Friday, June 23, 2006

two weeks, wha??

I feel like I've jumped through a time portal. Last I knew it was June 9th, I was home without a substantial summer job and out petitioning daily in the hot Nebraska sun to a wide array of responsive and not-quite-so responsive (or polite) Nebraska citizens. It's now June 23rd (Happy Birthday Julie!) How in the hell did I lose almost two weeks??? I'll tell you. I have to tell you everything now because I have had no time to until this point. The fact that I do have time now may point to the fact that something has again changed. My petitioning job turned into something more a week an a half ago: I was moved into the office and became the "Deputy Director of the Lincoln Office" Title. a real title. haha. That meant that for a salary (not hourly wage) I managed, hired, fired, and trained staff as well as selling my life to the campaign. Starting at 8:30 every morning, and working until 11pm every night, I absorbed as much about management as I could. It lasted 7 days. No, I haven't been fired. The campaign is over. The tribes who were sponsoring the initiative decided they didn't want to continue at this time, so three hours after we got the news in the office, the posters were down and the computer packed up. Wow. Fast turn around. These past two weeks have just been a flash of energy and opportunity. Luckily for me, that flash may have lasting effects: the company I who was running the campaign may move me to another location in the country to run another campaign. Oh wow! This is an amazing opportunity! I can hardly believe it. I feel very blessed. This is an actual job in grassroots politics that pays! I'm working with college grads with tons more experience for me (a great opportunity to find some fantastic mentors and role models) who are helpful, kind, and who want me to continue working with them! I don't know if it'll happen for sure, but both of my bosses from this campaign want to see me continue this summer on another campaign.

The whole experience has been very serendipitous and humbling. Since going to Italy I think of Lincoln not as the place where I have exciting, life changing experiences that further my goals and interests per say; I think of it more as a comfortable place where I come to decompress after having experiences that are those things and do relate to what I want to do and where I want to go with my life. I was selling it short. Look at this opportunity. You know, one of the partners of the company came to Lincoln for a few days to help on the campaign. She was sending emails and carbon copying them to Hillary Clinton. She was the senior VP of the Postal Service during 9/11 and the Anthrax scare! I drove here around Lincoln and while she spoke about other exciting political moments in her life, I stared at the streets of my home, the trees I've walked by for the majority of my cognizant life. It was a very surreal and humbling experience. Opportunity abounds many places. I was lucky in finding this.

So, I don't know what will happen but I've had a great time these past couple of weeks and have learned loads about the political world and being a manager. I'll keep you posted on what happens next!

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Lightening

i've been petitioning like crazy. "Hi, do you have a second to look at a petition?" I say. "No," they respond, "I'm on break." What does that mean? Would they rather I ask when they're at their desk? Apathy. America. Comfort.

Apparently I've impressed my boss, though. She's invited me to apply to help her and the other guy manage the office. Wow! Opportunity knocks. I'd make good money, but I'd have to sell my soul to the campaign. I guess I could do that. I'll decide tomorrow.

In the mean time, let me let you in on another decision's verdict: I'm staying at WHitman...I'm pretty sure. Georgetown and the fucking system can kiss my ass. Wow. Sorry Grandma. I'm a little bitter. They didn't give me NEARLY enough money. They claim they meet need. Well that "need" would put the average family below the poverty line. Only the rich and the poor get to go to the best schools. If they didn't claim to that everyone who is qualified can go, maybe I wouldn't be so bitter...but I've been told that all I have to do is get in, and then I'll be able to go. Well, I have gotten in. I've also worked hard to earn money, but THERE'S NO WAY! Whatever America, perpetuate your caste system. See if it'll really accomplish what you want it to.

Ahem, so, WHitman seems again to be my option. Luckily, it doesn't sound all that bad to me at the moment. :) So, we'll see....maybe this was supposed to happen......no lightening. Damn.

Saturday, June 10, 2006

intellectual arrogance

Arrogance is a character trait up with which I will not put. (and then who says prepositions can't go at the end?? hmmmm??) Really of all sorts. It's annoying and often a roadblock to getting things done. I've seen pride ruin relationships, opportunities, and conversations. People often think of arrogance in general terms and arrogance in terms of intellect is often left uninvestigated. I was reading a *ahem* facebook comment of a photo...golly...and was struck by the language one guy used. At first, it impressed me. He was eloquent and employed complex sentence structure...then I asked myself why I don't write like that and realized that I don't try to. I never have. In fact, until I went to Italy and took a class from a English teacher so enthralled by English that she inspired me, I thought elegant language unnecessary, something that clouds the meaning of statement with unnecessary bulk. I have changed my mind slightly and enjoy the nuances of language now. But, I still maintain that bombastic language used only for effect and not to enhance the meaning or readability of a text should not be used. By no means do I think that facebook message writer was out of line with his message, but it did bring to light the intellectual arrogance of a lot of smart people.

I find that a lot of smart people are open to new ideas and people from a variety of backgrounds...at least the ones I hang around. But, I've heard so many intellectuals come down on "normal folk," people who don't spend their days reading the newspaper, or even a book. Now, I agree that apathy and inaction caused by things other than newspapers or books is a huge problem, especially in the USA, and could be alleviated a bit if people unplugged themselves from the "boob tube", but to maintain that one lifestyle is inherently better than another lifestyle seems a little...hmm, arrogant. Still, comparing lifestyle choices is better than comparing given traits, such as intelligence. People often complain about the obsession with the physical. How dare we tell someone who's born a certain way they're not good enough? How dare we tell them they aren't pretty! They were born that way........so.........if we don't like judging each other based on physical traits we can't control, why would we condone judging people on mental traits we can't control? Some people are born with a higher IQ and they didn't do anything to deserve it...some weren't. I understand that intelligence affects social interaction, but intellectual arrogance is more than not wanting to interact with someone, it's thinking you're better. Comments like, "There were only two smart people in the class/group/school/board/etc.," not not demean those excluded by the statement, but also give them no chance to prove themselves. As my middle school stressed to me, there are many forms of intelligence and I'll bet those "non-smart people" would kick most intellectuals' asses if compared in other ways.

So basically what I'm saying is that intellectual arrogance pisses me off. Break it down people, you're just a human. If you can say you're human above a race, a sex, a religion, a nationality, or any other affiliation, then you should be able to say you're a human before a smart person, hell there's not even a noun for that one.

wow

Who else thinks this is cool?

I am pregnant with twins and need to know if my babies can be one day older than the other? Can I have one baby by one dad and the other by another dad?
Not only is it possible for fraternal twins to have different fathers, it’s on the medical record books. This official medical term for this phenomenon is heteropaternal superfecundation

Sperm cells can live inside a woman’s body for four to five days. Once ovulation occurs, the egg remains viable for another 12 to 48 hours before it begins to disintegrate; thus, the fertile period can span five to seven days.

Thursday, June 08, 2006

walking

I've recently heard of someone wanting to walk to Italy from Germany. What an idea. Pick yourself up and rely on your feet to carry you where you want to go. Enlightened. Exciting.

The only place I've been walking to lately is downtown to my job. That's right, I've got a job. I'm petitioning to get an initiative on the ballot that would allow the Indians-just so you all know, "Indian" is politically correct again- in Nebraska to build a few casinos. Most of the revenue would go for their economic development and the rest would go to an educational trust fund for the rest of the state. Seems like a great idea to me. I get a lot of "no's" though. People are against gambling or their just fucking racist. I've had a few people tell me "screw them" or "I don't think they need it." Open your eyes people! It makes me so angry that people are so self consumed and blind to reality. "I don't think they need it. Here kids, get in your booster seats because our car is too big for people sit in properly until they are satisfactorily obese. Oh my I think there's a fingernail scratch on here. Where's my lawyer?!?" Gr.

In other news, I'm pretty happy. I've been working a lot the past couple of days, which keeps my mind from day dreaming about walking to Italy and on the target (green papers with men's faces on them). I'm loving seeing my family and hoping that I will find a happy niche for the summer. If I don't, it's only two months. :)

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

decision

I know three a day is too much, but this has been quite a day.

I AM NOT GOING BACK TO WALLA WALLA.

My boss didn't fire me, but she couldn't give me enough hours. k. not enough $$=wasted summer. Even if it would have been a nice change (living on my own, college kids, new town, etc) it wouldn't have served the purpose of staying in the U.S. for the summer: working and money.

En tonces, I'm staying here....holy guacamole!!! I can hardly believe it. I'm going to get some jobs tomorrow. Going to go tell them they need me and they're going to believe it. Lordy lordy lordy.

photos

There's a thing in the world called facebook. It might serve to be the demise of all college students. I have been sucked into its clutches. Facebook allows college students to spend hours, hours they could be spending on homework or real human contact, to message each other, declare their relationship status, and create photo albums. I have a few of these, which I thought I'd share with you all. Click the link and you'll only see the album, not the demented workings of Facebook.

Please don't judge :)

UWC album: http://whitman.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2004539&l=17f91&id=48101631
Whitman1: http://whitman.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2002427&l=18c48&id=48101631
Whitman 2: http://whitman.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2002617&l=7155b&id=48101631
Winter break: http://whitman.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2002221&l=f4ca3&id=48101631
Spring break: http://whitman.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2003423&l=81084&id=48101631

the beginning

I can't say that this is going to be the most interesting blog for awhile. It will be what it will, as all things, I'm finding out.

Since Christmas, I've been struggling to figure out who I am, what I want to do, and how the hell to make that happen. It seems I have not managed to figure any of those things out. Shit. :) I may have lost my summer job in Walla Walla, which means I'm not going back like I was planning. Truthfully, I'm okay with that. My family is here and I don't think it's such a bad thing to spend as much time as possible with them while I still can. I can find a job. The market here isn't so bad as it is in Wally World. But, that was the one thing I thought I'd figured out....the summer will be what it will be, not what I want it or try to make it be.

The UWC and my relationship to it has been and will be for awhile something that haunts me, but in a good way. I went out for ice cream with Shaunna Meyer yesterday. She was the woman who taught "World Ex", which is the best class I've taken by far, and she's a graduate of a UWC. She makes me feel normal and helps me not to questions the pain I feel and the way I have been "protecting" myself from the world and people emotionally since graduating. You know, when I went to Montreal and stayed with my 18th year (he graudated from Italy a long time ago) we started talking about the school and he just started crying. Good for him. Good for me to see.

whims